While interesting
things are happening all around us every day, there are times when I’m
challenged to find worthy topics about which to ruminate and post to my blog.
I often look for
inspiration, especially when I travel, to the free copy of The USA Today newspaper that is delivered...generally with a loud
thud...to my hotel room door early each morning. But I have also found another source of inspiration
for my musings, and it happens to be what I would describe as The USA Today of news magazines: The Week. Its very applicable tag line is, “All you need to know about everything
that matters.”
The Week is a compilation of articles, stories, editorials, and
opinions from around the nation and the world.
These are presented in a concise, glossy magazine format whose editorial
content, together with a handful of full page ads, rarely exceeds 50 pages. The May 28th issue, for example,
has only 43 pages, including the front and back cover pages. And yet it is chock full of little gems.
For example, in
the “Only in America” section, there is the story of an upscale condominium
complex in Baltimore that is experiencing a messy problem. Apparently too many of its dog-owning residents
aren’t cleaning up after their pooches.
So the condo board is requiring residents to provide DNA samples from
their dogs. An owner could be faced with
a $500 fine should the DNA test reveal that his or her dog was the source of
the illicit poop. Commented one of the
dog-owning residents, “I feel like I’m living in a Seinfeld episode.”
Fart-absorbing blanket
There is another
section of the magazine that highlights things for which it was either a good
or bad week. One item said it was a good
week for sleeping in the same bed, noting that a New Jersey company is selling
what it has labeled a “Better Marriage Blanket.” This blanket, made from the same type of
materials used by the military to protect against chemical weaponry, is said to
effectively absorb fart odors. Who couldn't use one of those blankets?
But it
was a bad week for honesty when researchers found that the earlier a child
learns to tell convincing lies, the more likely he is to be successful later in
life.
I also learned
about how Republican Congressman Mark Souder of Indianapolis resigned from his
Congressional seat that he’d held since 1994.
It seems that Rep. Souder, who is an evangelical Christian and an
outspoken advocate for abstinence before marriage was having an affair with a
part-time member of his staff. The woman
even made some pro-abstinence commercials with him for a local Christian radio
station. But what is the big deal
here? Both Souder and the woman with
whom he had the affair are already married.
They are proponents of abstinence before marriage.
Shrimp on the barbie
In the always
fascinating “It must be true...I read it in the tabloids” section of the magazine, I learned
about how police in Australia’s Northern Territory on the lookout for a horny
Kangaroo who is harassing local women.
One woman reported that the Kangaroo “in an obvious state of sexual
arousal” followed her during her morning walk.
“There was no doubt what he wanted, the randy old thing,” the woman
said. I guess now we know where the
Aussie expression about throwing a little shrimp on the barbie came from.
In the Health
& Science section of The Week I
learned why people sigh (to help regulate their respiratory systems), that mice
grimace when they feel pain, and that head and neck skin cancer incidence is
higher on the left side than on the right, which may be due to long hours
behind the wheel of the car. Thus,
drivers get greater exposure to the sun on that side of their face and neck
than on the right side. Hmm. I wonder if, for drivers in Britain and Japan
where the driver sits on the right, head and neck skin cancer incidence is
greater on right side.
Seriously, where
else but in The Week (or in this blog)
would you learn about such critical matters?
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